Still Needs a Name

Newman, you are slacking.

Newman Has Landed

Newman has been invited to contribute to this blog.

Hang on to your hats, folks.

Summer Camp Is Over :(

Another Nationals in the books. Cones were hit and avoided, cars were broken and fixed, friendships were made and questioned, and trophies were won and lost. It was another best 10 days of the year, and I'm sad to leave Nebraska.

The drive out was as uneventful as we could imagine. Grand Potato and the Fleet of Ships encountered Big Bear, King Kong, and an unfortunate bystander in the form of Chris Dressler, while stopping in Ohio. No one was left behind. We had only one tire puncture (on the truck), while we were pulling into a gas station, and the spare tire was not as dry rotted and terrible as we thought, so we were able to make it to Nebraska without further incident.

My first Pro Finale might as well have been called "How to move up in Session 2, and totally blow it in Session 3." I started in 8th, moved to 7th after the first session, and ended up in 6th by the end of Day 1. However, that's where the rest of the event went to hell, because I was back in 8th by the end of Session 3. Despite this, I was held for the challenge rounds (my first time!) and  even though I didn't get in, it was nice to see my name above that orange highlighter line.

I didn't feel like I drove as well as I could have, and that the push and general weird feeling from the car was just because of the surface. As it would turn out, the lower control arm bushings separated, which explains the massive push and why the car felt more difficult to control. It was fine at the last Devens event, and on the drive out, so I'm guessing the 24 runs on the grippy concrete knocked them out. Not that these are excuses, because G-Fab doesn't make excuses. G-Fab is awesome, or we suck, and for the Pro Finale, I chose the latter.

At least the banquet was fun. There were lots of boobs. I think we got in trouble for laughing so much (or so loudly). I love these girls. We make it like the girl's locker room, but better. Eat your heart out, gentlemen.

"Suck" for the Pro Finale is ok, as long as you pick "Awesome" for Nationals. Somehow, I managed to find the secret third option: awesomely sucking. When you only get three runs, you're allowed two fuck ups, and my first run fuck up was that Nate, James, and I did not check the shock settings when we reinstalled them. I came back from my first run, with tons of cones, and told PJ that I couldn't control the car - when I turned one way, the car was hopping, and turning the other way resulted in massive push. He, like the logical creature he is, checked and found that one side was set to full soft, and the other was set to full stiff. Note to self - check next time.

Run 2 was positively perfect.  Good lines, good speed, good acceleration and braking points. No really. It was about as perfect as I could have done it - aside from one tiiiiiiny error. I based a cone, and if the wind had been blowing the other way, it would have stayed up, but alas. The 0.4 second lead was eliminated by that silly cone. Mother eff.

Run 3 started ok, but halfway through, the car started to not do so well again. I tried to be more aggressive, but by the end of the run, I ended up with 4 cones and the car pushing like a mother in labor. At some point, the bushing popped out and that's what was causing the car to handle poorly. I suppose this is fuck up #2, but at that point, I didn't care. I was solidly in 5th, which is actually the same as I have finished at every Nationals. I suppose I should not be surprised.

During open class competition, the engine oil starved and you could hear the rod knock from 100 yards away. Yep, another blown Nissan engine. Sigh. Lots of drama ensued. I'll spare you, mostly because it makes me sick to my stomach to even think of it anymore.

I was able to get into another car - Kate Mewhiney from DC Region offered a codrive in her 2011 WRX, and at the eleventh hour I took her up on it - Thanks Kate (and Paul)! You guys are lifesavers, and you don't know how much I appreciate the offer, especially at such an important event.

Photo courtesy of Paul Przyborski

I have never driven a Subaru further than two miles to get beer. My first run was tentative but smooth, and despite (more) cones I was able to lay down a time that would have been fast enough to at least trophy. Unfortunately, I didn't drive around the ridiculous understeery push that is synonymous with Subaru, and managed to lose it just before the end of my third (and really awesome) run...and so I would stay in fifth. Hey, when you have a streak, you should probably not break it, right?

I was also overwhelmed by the amount of support from people I only see two or three times a year. They were concerned how I was going to get the Grand Potato, and myself, home, they were making sure I had a drive for Day 2, they gave me a sounding board, and some just gave me a hug (because I needed LOTS of them after everything that happened). Thank you very much to all my friends for being so wonderful. 

As it would turn out, Thursday and Friday would be the two best days of Nationals. I was able to watch all my friends run, got a surprise golf cart and broke every rule on the warning label, had a squirt gun fight, got drunk at noon, and got to play with Tony F-ing Savini's dog, Flame. Tom O'Gorman and I engineered the most awesome, ugliest windbreaker for the golf cart I've ever seen. And he hit cones in reverse. It was great.  I also may or may not be co-driving golf carts with these two next year:

Now I'm sitting with PJ's legs on my lap, and my laptop on a panda, reflecting on a really great week with some of the best people in the world. It's a good thing we've already decided that we're going to Spring Nationals, because I am not even halfway home yet, and I miss it already. 

Up, Up, and Away!

G-Fab's PotaTOW Edition rolls 5 + 1 deep, heading to summer camp!

Todd and Jojo (the +1) are in Grand Potato, which is getting fantastically better gas mileage than the mighty Armada, currently housing Nate, Dave, PJ, and yours truly. We are getting 8.3 mpg, and were just warned that Indiana gas prices are $0.40 more expensive than in Ohio, and I just paid $4.18/gal. Yay.

Somewhere behind us is the Big Bear and Queen Kong camp, followed by the Thursbymobile. Wiley will come in on Saturday, BreakingTheLau will follow on Monday, as will Stiff and Grant. I hear Newman and #35 are en route as well....eventually.

We're somewhere in Ohio, the sun is coming up, and I've gotten 3 hours of sleep. I love the road trip. Of course, all my "stuff to do while smushed against the door and having a head using my leg as a pillow prop" is in Grand Potato, but at least there's a pretty sunrise.

More later. I need to tell the "head in lap" person that my leg is falling asleep.

Back To The Future

Wow, it's already August. Obviously you don't care what we've been up to, nor do we care enough to tell you when it's happening.

Dave, PJ, and I did the arrive-and-drive thing for Spring Nats at the end of May. Yes, it was expensive. No, I did not win anything. Yes, I drove/spun a C5 Z06. Yes, I will absolutely be going to this event again next year.  I will say, however, arrive-and-drive makes me feel helpless, and like a girl. No more of this girly shit. 

Photo by Chang Ho Kim

Mobil 1's The Grid was there. They missed most of the good stuff though, like Tornado Party, Heat 3 at Lazlo's, FJA getting ready to gang up on Newman (SUCK IT, F125 finally beat you!), me trying to collapse a kart stand, Sam "just coming down here to tell me something," and all the new Facebook friends I made from that weekend. I watched the broadcast, and for some reason they decided to film a bunch of GP cars, and ignore SS, SM, SSM....obviously they missed the memo that slow sucks and fast is fun.

June saw my return to Panda, which at first went badly, then went awesomely. I used back-to-back Renegade Miata events to practice before I made a fool of myself in SSM at the mid-month Devens Tour. It was actually the best battle weekend of the season, with Brian Kuehl and I fighting for the top spot. In 7 runs, I hit 22 cones. On my only clean run, I managed to take the top spot in SSM by .1. The next day, I managed to hit fewer, and still win the class. Yay.

The Devens Tour also saw my debut in the timing trailer. I think I'll stick to being scanner. Due to all the superstar drivers, the top of SSM was rough. I was in the 4th and last trophy spot at the end of Day 1, and managed to move up to 3rd on Day 2, beating my codriver by a bit over a second (which no one expected, least of all me). I suppose we shouldn't count those results, since the Kuehls added a wing that takes up more of the allowable area than we have, and their bigger budget means they could purchase and install it. 

Photo by Ed Savage

I was unable to attend the Dover Evolution Super Shootout, so I can't comment on it. I was exceptionally sad, however. I did speak to some people on the phone, and they said blah blah AIRWOLF blah blah course is bad blah blah AIRWOLF. I think I missed something - apparently it's some show that debuted and ended before I was born. All these old people in autocross.

We just finished up the Toledo Pro, and it was a hot mess. Bad run/work order, bad schedule, bad courses (sorry Alex). There was some good, too, though. Good to see friends and hang out, good competition in L2 (6/8, again. I need to stop going so slow), and good that Newman finally manned up and found his big boy pants. He drove Panda in SSM. I think he had fun. Good new game too. Battle Pitchers. I will most likely lose this game, but I will put up a good fight.

Photo by James Newman

RAL is this weekend, and somehow we've managed to suck at fundraising. Too bad, PJ was going to shave his head if we got $2,000. Given only 26 people are going into this, it should be easy to solidify another GFab Jeff Gordon Challenge win. At least I hope so. 

Nationals is next...the Big Show....the whole Shebang...let's hope I don't completely choke this time.